Before I begin, allow me first to inform readers, especially if they belong to any Christian Faith, that I am a Catholic and I was once a Catholic Missionary.
Why is Good Friday named Good?
What is good about Jesus of Nazareth being crucified on a Cross?
Would you say that it is a good day when your loved one dies or commemorate that day as Goodbye Day?
Call it anything more befitting but good!!!
That is not my only beef
I have had a few similar discussions with Catholic priests. I have been threathened that I will not receive a Catholic burial in a Catholic Cemetery because they consider my arguments heresies. One Catholic priest went further by threatening me to have me excommunicated from the Catholic Church!!!
I answered this Catholic priest that the entire Earth is God’s Cemetery and not the delineation of a piece of land that the Catholic Church calls it as their burial ground for their departed members.
Practising Catholics pay more attention to rituals than to the worship of God.
The Seat of Catholicism in the Vatican choreographs these rituals and processions, with acts of piety that emulate secular National Day parades rather than continually being the source of solace by acts of Charity, Refuge and Relief with the massive wealth that the Catholic Church possesses.
Do you think that on Judgement Day, God will appear in the manner how the Pope or any of his Bishops and Priests parade themselves? Red carpets, pomp and pageantry?
I reckon God will simply make His presence with by a bolt of lightning that will bring humankind down on their knees. No red carpet, no electronic organ, no choir singers, no strutting around dispensing blessings.
0 COMMENTS on “When Senior Citizenry Comes A-Knocking”
With age comes seniority.
Alas! With age comes senility too.
Like when I am at the treshold of my second childhood and looking bewildered and found dressed like this; giving Love a Bad Name. Hahaha
I would faintly recall being told that I had to wear breast guards for my heart condition. Or was I being treated by my Psychiatrist for sex identity crisis? …mummble, mummble.
“Honestly child, I can hardly remember anything these days…yawwwwwn Is it bedminton time child?”
Anyway, in this instance before that could happen, my youngest son, Kevin and his close friends decided to give me a dinner treat on my Birthday. I was informed just moments before I was taken to a Restaurant serving Western cuisine.
Dinner for me meant Prawn Salad, Mashed Potatoes, Tenderloin Steak medium-rare and black coffee.
Having done that, we spent time with small talk and despite the age gap I had with the group, it did not matter until I was told to open my gift.
Gingerly I opened a small box which had SAVINELLI 1876 emblazoned on it. I thought it contained something that firmly placed me as a relic.
On opening the box I found it contained a beautiful pipe.
Here we go! They felt that I had reached the age where a man must look more imposing by smoking a pipe rather than those foul smelling, polluting sticks of cigarettes that is akin to the bourgeoisie class.
So, they gathered around for a photo take. For the first shot, I wanted to pose with the iconic scowling countenance of Sir Winston Churchill but it came nowhere close.
Ahhh what the heck! Just be myself.
I take it that the pipe certifies me for senior citizenry and I pray that second childhood never will be. LOL!
7 COMMENTS on “The Last Cardinal Sin”
And it came to pass, that a new Pope was to be selected by the College of Cardinals gathered in the august chamber at the Vatican in Rome.
Cardinals from the World over arrived in deep prayerful hope, that they would be the new Pope.
Finally, on the appointed day, they were summoned by the Chairperson of the College of Cardinals. The Chairperson spoke softly to them that he hoped the Cardinals would select a Pope who would be exemplary, a man beyond reproach, an Immaculate Interception in the troubled times of Faith.
The Cardinals chorussed, “OPO” in unison.
Then the Chairperson announced that this time the format will be unprecedented because of the gravity enjoined in selecting such a Pope.
And the Cardinals in wonderment chorussed, “OHH” in unison.
So it was, that on that day, the Cardinals all standing in a row, were instructed to undress and remain naked in their positions.
The Cardinals invoked, “Jesu Christus” in pharisaic disbelief. But talaga they knew that if they did not obey, out they go and there goes their life long dream of ever becoming Pope someday, diba?.
There was an uneasy hush in the Chamber. Some eyes looked plaintively towards Heaven for deliverance. Some eyes looked curiously, sideways, to peek, at you know what lang.
Then in walked three scantily dressed Arabian women belly dancers sige with jingling bells, tied around their feet. And the Chairperson nodded his head with approval and waved his hand the dancers to begin.
The dancers went into a frenzy, bellying and bobbing, swaying and batting their outsized eyelids as they gyrated p*kipot-ly past each Cardinal, one by one.
And any Cardinal who failed to be Immaculate and BOINGGG! UP went their sanctified pride of manhood, they were whisked out of the Chamber. Disqualified of course.
This lasted almost the entire day until it left three Cardinals. The Chairperson decided to allow the exhausted dancers to retire and called it a day.
The following day, the three Cardinals were summoned and in the same manner they were put through the routine as the previous day.
The dancers stepped up their tempo and WOOHOO immediately two Cardinals went BOINGGG! and they were disqualified.
The Chairperson was elated and as he was about to announce the name of the last Cardinal standing, one of the dancers dropped her teat cover. She turned around to search for it, saw it on the floor and stooped to pick it up.
At that precise moment, it was the darkest day in Christendom.
Our Immaculate Cardinal saw her stark behind and her pink glory and hallelujahhh… BOINGGG!!! he went.
There was no Pope na.
This is not found in the Annals of Church History.
It is not found in Google Search.
This is a release from a classified manuscript that Indiana Jones found tucked in the bottom of one of the three Arabian belly dancers while he was at Carnal Knowledge Bistro in Timbuktoo.
16 COMMENTS on “My Birthday Wish”
If it is true that necessity is the mother of all inventions then my Birthday wish is the cradle of a brave new Philippines.
You may think that there is scant hope for the Philippines as she is bedevilled with surmounting social and environment troubles.
Not so if my Birthday wish is embraced by a tumultuous reformation.
It found its origins when there was a recent outbreak of that dreadful Measles in several places in the Philippines. Anti-Measles Vaccine is given free to all. Did I understand it is given free?
Now that is something that only happens in that country when there is a mudslide or an earthquake or floods or a volcano explosion or typhoon for hapless victims.
Is that the only freebie? Are there any other freebies in the Philippines of which I know not?
Maybe there are if one considers these goings-on:
1. Free sex that Pinoys trick young girls into obliging their horny needs.
2. Free babies as a result of Number 1.
Rubbish you say?
You would not when you consider that all these freebies will end Graft, robbery, poverty and many more crimes.
Freelipines gives her citizens the unparalleled distinction of receiving:
Free medical and hospitalization
Free dental and eye care
Free movies and entertainment
Free energy and water supply
Free home and personal gadgets
Just to mention a few and to win your undivided vote and support for the planned reformation of what will become FREELIPINES.
I knew you would ask this question.
We shall leave that to the newly elected President and his Congress to figure that out.
38 COMMENTS on “A Birthday Tribute to Windy”
Time is seemingly ticking by so fast. Was it not only yesterday when Windy had his 62nd birthday?
Well, the birthday boy is turning not only one year older; he has also grown more silly by another year, but definitely wiser and better. Each year that he does, it’s always a milestone.
I reminded him a couple of days ago that his 63rd birthday is fast approaching. I was surprised to have received his reply denying that he is 63!
Boy! Oh boy! This is the first time that the brilliant Windy did that!
Oh well! I could only surmise cheekily that it must have been the effect of young love. Kilig to the bones!
I am more than happy to give it to him. Just as I had declared in 2010 that I shall be 25 years old forever, his birthday this year onwards will be his 36th forever! Doesn’t that sound cool?
I always find the celebration of birthdays as wonderful opportunities to let a person know what his life and work has meant to me. Thus, this birthday tribute for Windy.
For the 7 years that I have known Windy, there was never a dull moment. Either we were bantering, discussing, or arguing, he’d always say he wins any argument and I don’t have a chance of winning AT ALL. It has always been a losing battle with him although there were times I felt that I have been a runaway winner. LOL! But since it’s his birthday- again- I am giving it to him being the brilliant Windy that he is. When I refused to argue, he’d say that I am the most diplomatic blogger around. LOL! So, you must have understood by now that indeed, there is never a dull moment with Windy.
It seems only yesterday that I’ve known this man and there was no turning back since then. It has been an open book how I have admired him as a person; being the generous, compassionate and brilliant man that he is. He is the kind of person who’d be willing to do the extra mile for you.
Over the years, Windy had been there not only as my blog mechanic and blog Co-Author; but more than all, he has been a real good friend to me. Our friendship went beyond the realms of blogging. As a matter of fact, he was even one of the Principal Sponsors (Ninong) of my brother at his wedding. Truth be told, no matter how much we fight on every trivial and minute issues, Windy will always be a special man.
Last night, he expressed to me his disappointment. Blogging has become pathetic and has ultimately reached its end. Gone were the days when bloggers come by a blog to express their appreciation and support to either the blogger or the blogpost by way of comments. That’s how I made lots of blogpals after all- by way of interacting through comments. He told me it’s pointless to blog into space infinity; that even if I work doubly hard for my blog’s traffic and rankings, the heydays of blogging has bottomed out. Bloggers have become addicted to Instant Messaging and social media which is less time consuming and more convenient. Hence, the need to read a lengthy blogpost has became a mundane and mediocre task.
I want to prove him wrong. I want to make him see that even with the social media mileage, there are still bloggers like him and like me who passionately blogs our heart out and is willing to show support to fellow bloggers even when we are not bound by any rules.
I would hate for it to let Windy dissipate into thin air all because blogging had lost its height and glory. I believe he still has so much to give. He can’t waste his writing prowess just like that. I have lured him too many times in the past to come back to blog even when he already had given up blogging. We both know that blogging comes to him naturally and he does it amazingly- the Windy way!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WINDYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!
It has been such a huge honor to sit in circle with you sharing a lot of beautiful, joyful, and hilarious blogging moments. I will always be in extreme gratitude for all the wisdom that you have shared at Lainy’s Musings, and I must say that you’re like no other. You have given me, and the countless others, the keys to a long-lost and vast universe of unlimited creativity, vision, and healing that opens the heart of the soul. Your unbridled articles are enriching, stimulating, empowering, thought-provoking, and at many times touched the big Filipino ego BUT I personally find it admirable and remarkable for you have a genuine and unique way of speaking your unbiased thoughts unfavourably and fearlessly.
Thank you for a lifetime of friendship shared with you. Stay happy, young and vibrant. I wish you all the strength, energy and vigour that you need to keep you going and sustain the making of “Baby Caroline.”
Cheers and may the Force be always with you!
I initially wanted to publish this tribute by virtue of a video presentation with Windy’s favorite song PLAY ME as a musical background. I fell short of my preparations because of the time zone difference. I deemed it best to publish all photos I have of Windy and the captions were either his publication or mine talking about how exceptional he is as a blogger and as a person.
28 COMMENTS on “Philippines – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly”
Once again here are additional reflections on issues that I observed during my recent 49 days Visa in the Philippines. Obviously it may not be the case throughout the Country but it gave me additional insights.
Generally, the neighbors are willing to come forward to render assistance for whatever seems a bother. Like on the day I returned with two plywood sheets 8 feet by 4 feet on the cabin top of the tricycle, young able guys came out from seemingly nowhere and carried them for me to the house.
We had servings of food from whoever was celebrating a birthday. It is a nice gesture and though I found the food inedible, it is the thought that matters.
I found that Filipinos renege on their word. It makes me wonder whether they agree on something just to appear agreeable and polite to foreigners but in their hearts they feel otherwise.
Often I hear it said, “I am shy”. In my mind and depending on the situation I find that contradictory. How can one say, “I am shy” when making a request that I refuse but offer another solution when in the first instance the guy was not shy at all by begging for money???
The Media serves trash in most of their programs.
TV shows cannot be without a Gay actor/presenter in it. Radio deejays talks cock and some of their conversations are not for the ears of minors. Filipino songs are drab as they lack composition creativity. Singers scream and not sing. Music accompaniment is loud and harsh and drowns the singer’s vocals.
Corruption reeks in every aspect of life there. Even though the rate of inflation is reported as 3.9 percent in March this year, in reality corruption makes inflation very much larger.
Consumer prices are not controlled for essential goods.
Respected Malls and Supermarkets sell local products at imported branded product price. Forget imported products.
Despite the propaganda from President Benigno Aquino that the Philippine Economy has mended and is continually improving (due to his oh so astute leadership), the basic truth is that the Philippine Peso is stagnant at near 45 Peso to 1 USD. The purchasing power of the Peso has not improved.
The lack of transparency, poverty, abuse, insolvent corruption and inordinate displacement of incalculable amount of public funds continue to drive the Philippines towards becoming a failed State.
3 COMMENTS on “What Did The Fox Say?”
This was excluded in my earlier and last Post, “Come Closer, Come Closer and Listen” just below this Post and now instead of having made my work easier I have to do it twice.
Why the title “What Did The Fox Say?”
Firstly, it is the most stupidly funny song composition.
Secondly, I am getting out-foxed.
There is an ironic resemblance about what did the fox say because it connects to why it appears so hard for me to father a baby with Joy.
Like it is sung in the song of the same title…
What does the fox say?
What the fox say?
What the fox say?
What the fox say?
And we all know that…
But theres one sound
That no one knows
What does the fox say?
You lost me
I know you lost me now. You’re just not smart enough to make the connections.
I went ning nings, pa pa pows, hatee hatee ho’s with Joy. And you can add all the positions I am still physically capable at my age and yet there is no sign of conception but the dreaded day of the month for all womankind. Her best friend visits her and paints her red for failure.
What is the problem?
Like in the song, it is a deep and dark secret. An ancient mystery known only to women with a fickle menstrual cycle.
The secret of the fox
Somewhere deep in the woods
I know youre hiding
What is your sound?
Will we ever know?
Will always be a mystery
What do you say?
Now, how do I shoot a moving Ovulation target?
Due to my dilemma, the Philippine Immigration White Card will have to add one more reason for incoming travellers such as me in the Purpose of Visit column.
: to make baby
Tell me how or baby will never be.
And no acrobatics please.
5 COMMENTS on “Come Closer, Come Closer and Listen”
It has been almost two months since I was away in the Philippines.
Lainy asked me to update what on earth I was doing there for that length of time.
I could aptly borrow from Lulu’s lyrics with adaptation to describe what on earth I did.
My ? went
Boom bang-a-bang, boom bang-a-bang
When Joy is near
Boom bang-a-bang, boom bang-a-bang
Loud over here
Pounding away, pounding away
Okay, I will save you the boring narration of my plane flight and airport and taxi. I found my way on my own by taxi to the rented house and I was not cheated by the taxi driver.
During the long stay, I managed to complete all the things that I wanted to do at the rented house.
I built a divan for the spring mattress, a base for the refrigerator, shelves on the wall and a foldable table for the laptop out of plywood and timber. I installed electrical fittings and an advanced water filter system at the kitchen washbasin. I cooked meals everyday and the neighbors almost suffered from diarrhea.
(No that was a joke) They loved my Malaysian dishes and became more friendly to get more. I told them not to be greedy.
The shop owners, the Sari-Sari owners and the market vendors were so happy to see me back again.
I met a cute three month old baby girl and her parents who live in the same compound. Her name is Covely. For a moment I thought how stupid that they failed in their Spelling B and did not name her Lovely. I gave 200 Pesos so generously to Covely and then feared that their whole Barangay would line up their wives holding their babies at the front of my house the following day!
Well, after having done the divan for the spring mattress, I realized from live tests that it needed more timber support or my pounding would land Joy and me falling through the divan’s woodwork onto the floor. LOL!
Spent many anxious nights reading all there was on the Internet about the missing Malaysian Airline jetplane MH370 that up till now is still unrecovered.
In between housework, cooking and wondering if my return plane would suffer the same fate as MH370, I also did the laundry by hand and remained mostly at home.
There was a tragic robbery cum murder in the first week I was there. So it was not advisable to be out of the house unless to answer a real need.
About the robbery…a snatch thief whipped out this handgun and fired at a middle aged Australian when the latter grappled with this shoulder bag from being snatched. The Aussie was reportedly a Church Minister and he held only his Bible in his shoulder bag. He died valiantly for a book! I mean he died stupidly for a Bible. He was fatally shot in the face right below his eye and in his chest.
Helpless bystanders looked on in disbelief at the crime and the murderer rode away on his motorbike. The food seller warned me to be careful because I look like a rich man when I dress up and walk on the roads. I told him I am not afraid because I carry a live King Cobra inside my pants.
I went to look at a new housing estate being developed somewhere off Cavite. I liked the quality of the house materials and design but I did not like the location. So the matter of acquiring a rent to own house for Joy is shelved till I find something better.
I bought her birthday cake at Goldilocks and sang the Birthday Song for Joy on April 4th. She said I have such a lovely voice. Roll over Justin Bieber.
All in all, it was a good time, learning more about life in the Philippines. I lost 18 kilograms in body weight and my Credit Card too!
I am back at home now and I shall return to the Philippines as soon as possible.