Post Author: Windy 
At the end of a long, long Commentary discourse between Lainy and I at the Post titled, 
“Cheer Up! Join PayMe2Blog and Long Live Blogging” she had this Comment:
You’re incorrigible! I am itching to pinch your bum!
That itch comes from her newly gained knowledge about Italian men who are notorious with their unbridled butt pinching practice in their motherland. Well, even the Russians are known to do the same. But nevermind the Italians or the Russians. Now it has become an itch for Lainy and she might just start a new Filipina fad.
Well, it depends whether she wants her fingers soiled if she were to pinch my butt right now.
Yesterday afternoon, during a poo session, I noticed that the poo bowl was splattered with a lot of blood as I stood up to get off my throne.
Horror of horrors! What on earth is that? Did I have a bout of rectal bleeding?
I have never seen this occurrence in my entire 60+ years.
NO! It can’t be. I am having my MAN-O-PAUSE.
Hurriedly, I cleaned up myself and rushed to my laptop to read whatever there is about rectal bleeding.
It said a lot. Enough to worry me. The bleeding could be something simple to something life threathening like colon cancer.
As always, I refused to rush to the Doctor because I NEVER TRUST THEM. They would conveniently recommend me for immediate surgery just to make a tidy profit.
I also take an Aspirin a day to treat my heart condition. And it is a known fact that prolonged Aspirin causes internal bleeding.
So now, is it the Aspirin? Or is it something else and not Aspirin, like internal hemorrhoid or a intestinal acne that ruptured? Yeah, my butt is as smooth as my face and can be mistaken as one.
I rushed to my Pharmacy and bought the expensive “Daflon” 500 mg to treat my insides.
The bleeding never recurred and that is certainly a mental relief. I do not suffer any sharp pains in my anus or stomach and that adds more confidence.
So, Lainy, if you still have that itch to pinch my butt, please avoid pinching close to my anus!
K M
First commenter for this post…
General Santos Time
hi windy,
it’s always good to get a professional opinion
you have the right anyway to refuse surgery or any procedure they would request for you. have you ever had colonoscopy before? and was it fresh blood or dark in color like old blood? you’re right that the bleeding could range from anything simple as hemorrhoids to something life-threatening like colon cancer, and it’s worth to have a physician look into it 
i think a doctor’s consult with is not a bad idea at all, and then depending on what his advice and findings are, you can take it from there . as they say, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure 
good that the bleeding stopped, but i would still suggest seeing a doctor just to cover your bases.
take care, windy!
KM´s last [type] ..JOE’S CRAB SHACK
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If somebody pinches my butt I will slap the person. Hahaha! That’s rude. Did you have constipation? That causes bleeding too. Might as well watch your diet. Yeah, doctors will only give you that suggestion especially if they know your age.
Marms
Marms´s last [type] ..Car Service For Business Travels In New York
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Oh, I’m worried about you while reading this post. Well, I just want to repeat what the others said, Please go and consult a doctor.
rona´s last [type] ..Si Ning Kumakanta!!
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Windy,
Please don’t be stubborn and have your stool checked. That’s one way to find out if something is wrong. Or better yet, like what KM mentioned above, it won’t hurt to see a Doc just this once. Forget about that fucked up Indian Doc, ok?
But hey! KM said a physician will be looking into it like what you’ve exactly told me, hahaha!
Are you willing to let any physician see through your anus? LOL! 
Ok. Ok. I will spare you my bum-pinching rage. Sorry, I didn’t know you’ve been into that predicament.
Just be a doll now and see a Doc, OK????
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@ KM, Marms, Rona and Lainy,
I know you are right and positive about getting my royal ass appraised by a qualified Doctor. Four rights do not a wrong make.
Having begun treating myself with Daflon, I also stopped the Aspirin and will observe my ass.
Ever since the first bloodlet, I have poo’ed 6 times without a trace of blood. It has become a bloodhound ritual now after each poo session. It could even make a good plot of the next Sherlock Holmes movie, titled: “The Bleeding Asshole”.
No discomfort or abdominal pains felt save for the occasional fart. Hahaha.
We’ll see guys.
[Reply]
Lainybelle Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 12:35 pm
@Windy,
LOL! The Bleeding Asshole sounds a nice ACTION movie title to me, hahaha!
Occasional fart is normal as long as you don’t have the blood each time you poo.
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Better late than never, Windy
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Self-medicating/treating can be dangerous, too. It’s good that no more bloody poos after that isolated episode, but I still would suggest and urge you to check with a doctor 
KM´s last [type] ..JOE’S CRAB SHACK
Lainy, I think what you need to do to clean up your FB widget is to get a new code, and when you do, you’ll see boxes there with options which one you’d like to show in the widget, untick whatever you don’t want (it gives you a preview whenever you tick and untick a box), and then you can even adjust the width/height size of the widget, then generate the code. Hope this helps
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Windy Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 12:01 pm
@KM,
Welcome back, KM!
Yes, what you say isn’t at all wrong.
There is a huge BUT from me when it relates to MD’s.
Case 1: I had hemorroids several years ago and it was actually the result of having used toilet paper too severely that it ruptured the rectal lining.
I went to see a Doctor who after taking a peep, he wanted immediate surgery done.
I finally cured myself of the hemorroids by self discipline, suppositories and a wonder ointment “PILEX”.
Case 2: I carelessly contracted Diabetes and was again with the Doctor.
The first Doctor who treated me, gave me antibiotics and a cream to apply to my lacerated penis foreskin ( a usual occurrence with Diabetes ). My Diabetes became acute with the wrong diagnosis and treatment.
I went to see a different Doctor who said it was Diabetes and gave me the required medication. A medication that the French Pharmaceutical producer claims it is effective only for about 9 years because the human body develops an immunity to the drug after a prolonged ingestion.
I threw away the drug and decided to “cure” or stabilize my Diabetic condition through a change in life style, proper diet and exercise.
Today I am “non Diabetic” (my blood sugar is well under control and that of a normal non Diabetic) but continue face admonitions from other MD’s for not taking the drug.
Case 3: I had more than 12 severe heart seizures which were always caused when I had abdominal gas going in the opposite direction for clearance.
Call it heartburn or gas reflux as it appeared to be but it did not accompany other symptoms of what is declared as a heart attack.
No doubt the intense and shearing pain is located where the heart it but there were none of the other signs that come with a heart attack.
In fact, even with the intense pain, I could still walk, climb a full flight of stairway and was never in a state of semi paralysis.
Yet, the Doctors who treated me and their ECG declared it was a major heart attack. They are so stereotyped in their profession. They go strictly according to their books. They can’t think out of the box. Pain near the heart = HEART ATTACK.
In the case of a jilted lover who suffers pain near the heart, the can’t see it as HEART ATTRACT!!!
I was hospitalized and held in the ICU. I argued with the Cardiologists that they were treating symptomatically and not treating the cause. Lots of arguments until one lady Cardiologist finally believed in my self diagnostics.
The gastro-entrologist was brought in to treat me and after treating me for acids, gas and whatever was causing the reflux, I did not have any recurrence of the heart shearing pains or chest pains.
I was kept on a Cardiology program with the Hospital after that. I had several tests conducted and then this Cardiologist told me that I am 60 percent improved and that she wanted me to undergo an angioplast.
She said it without knowing I had a blood test done two weeks prior to that and on that same morning I had done 3 heart stress tests.
I challenged her statement about where on earth she derived that 60 percent? Relative to what? And I told her straight to her face that she neither read my test results nor based her statements on the basis of actual test results.
I stormed out of the room and told her to destroy all my hospital records.
Today I am happily treating myself with the help of an old faithful Pharmacist for the right directions for medicines.
And I can do marathons without any ill effects on my heart.
[Reply]
KM Reply:
February 22nd, 2012 at 5:44 am
@Windy,
I’m so sorry to hear you had to go through all those predicaments. I guess with a long history of medical mishaps, there’s no way we can convince you to go to a doctor then. It sounds like you’re managing well self-treating, and the bleeding did not recur anyway, so I think we can agree for now that it was just a bad case of either hemorrhoids or MANOPAUSE
KM´s last [type] ..MY FIRST SKI-DVENTURE
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I think you have a GERD (Gastroesophageal reflux disease ) , that’s what I have now,but thank God, I’m doing well, my drugs is only over the counter which is TUMS or PRILOSEC. Watch your diet, some foods that would trigger your heartburn ,are coffee, chocolate, tomato sauce, caffeine, fats, fish and alcohol.
In my own opinion, base on my experience, balance your diet is really important, exercise, eat healthy food ( it helps a lot to me and I enjoy today).If you are in a foreign country it is normal to adjust and suffer once in a while.LOL!
I got my heartburn from, dried fish, mongo,coffee.It’s like an allergy that my digestive system can’t handle.
My symptoms was chest pain, heart burn, blood in the stool.I felt I have a heart attack. I do the colonoscopy,blood test, ultrasound, ECG Thanks God everything is clear and normal.Good thing I have insurance or else I have to break my bank account with all the lab tests.
My suggestion for you is-if you feel dizzy, headache, vomit, abnormal bruises, see a special doctor for cancer and check the tip of your finger or nail if it is black, go directly to a special doctor.
And eat at the right time.Ulcer may trigger your GERD.
Hope this would give you an idea, sorry to hear about it. Malayo pa yan sa bituka…lol, just ask Lainy if you can’t understand.
Travelentz´s last [type] ..Kodak ZX3
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Windy Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 4:56 pm
@Travelentz and @KM,
Ahhh let me first deal with Colonoscopy which was also asked by KM at her first Commentary.
Allow me to give you some background to the ordeal I endured when I had to submit myself for corrective surgery after being treated for removal of stones in my Bladder.
I was made to understand that a tube was inserted inside after laser bombardment and removal of the stones. And I had to return a month later to have the tube removed. I must not miss that corrective surgery or it will complicate the entire recovery.
Soooooo…… here I was in 1997, at the Private Specialist Hospital to have the tube removed. After completing the preliminaries, I was laid on a Operating Theater stretcher and wheeled in.
Next I was wheeled to the Operating Table. A male attendant removed my green overalls. I lay naked. He then raised my legs and had each leg mounted on a vertical stirrup.
Then two very young female attendants walked by and stood along the wall facing me. They looked like High School Girls and were there for a School Project paper. I say that because they were whispering into each other’s ear and giggling.
I was simply appalled. I commanded, “Rise Brother, Rise like a King Cobra. Show them how fearsome you are!” But alas! still weak from the recent surgery, it could not lift itself without hiring a crane.
It is only then that the male attendant returned and pulled a curtain over my body so that I could not see the two idiot giggling girls and below my waist.
Not long after that, the Surgeon turned up, said a few things to the attendant. Then I felt something being slipped into my urethra.
OMG! these barbarians were doing corrective surgery WITHOUT HAVING GIVEN ME A LOCAL ANESTHESIA!!!
And the Surgeon was talking to the attendant to help him see what was on the monitor as he groped around to get hold of the tube and remove it.
I know not being a VIRGIN, I could bear the ordeal and use mind over matter whenever I heard the Surgeon exclaim, “Ahhh missed it”
Then the Surgeon would tell me from behind the drawn curtain to hold on, the tube is coming out.
It finally did.
Before leaving the Hospital, I went to see my Specialist and query him how come I wasn’t even given a local anesthesia before the tube removal was performed.
“Didn’t they give you one?”, was all he could muster.
Now about Colonoscopy….. I can’t imagine a repeat of my stones corrective surgery.
This time it WILL HURT because this part of my lower sexy half is still a VIRGIN.
[Reply]
Lainybelle Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 5:36 pm
@Windy,
OMG! You are so funny, Windy! I was laughing so hard on this part:
“They looked like High School Girls and were there for a School Project paper. I say that because they were whispering into each other’s ear and giggling.
I was simply appalled. I commanded, “Rise Brother, Rise like a King Cobra. Show them how fearsome you are!” But alas! still weak from the recent surgery, it could not lift itself without hiring a crane.
This time it WILL HURT because this part of my lower sexy half is still a VIRGIN.
[Reply]
Windy Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 8:20 pm
@Lainybelle,
You find me funny?
For the death of me I will never know what those two giggling girls found funny about my ding-a-ling.
I know it does not look like Charlie Chaplin!!!
[Reply]
Lainybelle Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 8:40 pm
@Windy,
Yeahhhh! You are funny!!! You always make me laugh by your hilarious antics.
They must be virgins and never have seen a ding-a-ling till you came in the operating room, LOL!
[Reply]
Windy Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 8:43 pm
@Lainybelle,
DUH! Girlssssss…… how dare they giggle at Brad Spitt?
[Reply]
Lainybelle Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 8:45 pm
@Windy,
That’s because they are just girls, not women, hehehe!
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Windy Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 5:04 pm
@Travelentz,
Thank you.
IF only those Doctors and Specialists who attended to my heart condition had what you experienced. I would have been spared all that anguish.
Yes, valuable inputs and I will look out for those tell tale signs.
I do have a Medical and Hospitalization Insurance cover. To use it might be BAD NEWS.
Yeah, Lainy will have to interpret your Tagalog line to me. LOL
[Reply]
Lainybelle Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 5:40 pm
@Windy,
Simply means it can’t be the cause of your death, hehehe! Pardon my futile attempt at translating Tagalog to English. You know I am more adept at Visayan English as you would often tease me, LOL!
[Reply]
Windy Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 8:21 pm
@Lainybelle,
I see.
I guess it will be some Doctor that will be the cause of my death. LOL!
[Reply]
Lainybelle Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 8:41 pm
@Windy,
Hahahahaha!
You aren’t even willing to see one. They are going to look into your royal ass this time around. You have to think doubly hard on that, LOL!
[Reply]
Windy Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 8:50 pm
@Lainybelle,
Nahhh I can’t downgrade my asset.
The Saudi oil Sheik won’t pay a premium for a non virgin ass.
It’s my only proud insurance after my Bank Account.
[Reply]
Lainybelle Reply:
February 21st, 2012 at 8:58 pm
@Windy,
Bwahahahaha! You are the naughtiest! So you really are going to preserve your royal ass? LOL!
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